Sciencesplaining: Your Ancestry

Gary Larson

This is going to be a post where I'm screaming into the void.

For obvious reasons there is a renewed interest in heritage and ancestry and geneological descendants. Here we go again.

I'm reading blogs and SM posts where people are doing their geneological trees (unless you go into archival records of births almost impossible) and DNA ancestry.

The latter is probably one of the best scams I've ever seen. 

1. This is not how DNA or the genome works

2. There is no test at present that can test your ancestry accurately. I DONT CARE WHAT THE INTERNET SAYS.

Seniors are the most gullible target group

3. Your genetic information is your property

DNA based Anc.

This is data fed into a computer database and your paying for a printout. If you have anything African in your printout (and you're white); congratulations you got duped.

Most Americans have European heritage. If youre white based on the law of probability there'll be a high percentage of a European mix. Mostly western because...eastern Europeans didn't track it and there is not much of a data base in North/west Africa, especially none that could differentiate countries there.

So. Where are all those genome differences coming from if there is no data set to compare it to and differentiate from?

Well. Your geographic location is one data set. Haven't seen the forms you fill out. Next up is that it's being compared to other people who are sending it in, probably not your ancestors.

POCs can be African, Caribbean or other places. Also not being considered because there is NO data. (I'm picturing some poor bloke named John Lamar the fifth sitting in an office: Hey John could we take a swab again to throw it into the mix again as evidence)

Instead of a pyramid scheme you're probably getting friends and family involved because hey you're from France (dating as far back as Gaul?) or Prussia or Germania or I'm tired of this.

23a.me was valued at 6billion in 2021, probably made 5.9, went bankrupt, selling your genetic info in the process. There's a class action lawsuit at the moment:

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/nov/30/why-i-regret-using-23andme-i-gave-up-my-dna-just-to-find-out-im-british

I'm angry because I'm tall, blonde and blue-eyed and for the last decade I have to listen to  strangers' ancestral history (who approach me in RL) when I wasn't asking and it's getting more frequent. (See previous posts). And because this is harming humans and animals alike.

Covid went Bat to human to human. Suddenly pangolin DNA was in the test. They are critically endangered already.

If this BS continues then you may have to explain that ancestral derpy shepherd in your genome to your family one day.

Here are some ethical implications dating back to 2009:

https://jlhochschild.scholars.harvard.edu/publications/politics-genomics-research-implications-dna-racial-identity-and-race-based

And for your DNA as your property (and another lawsuit)

The immortal life of Henrietta Lacks by Rebecca Skloot is a very good book

Submitting your DNA may have the opposite effect of what you intend.

Cooking with Codex: Boomba curry rice and beans without fetch

 

Rice dish in pot
Tastes better than it looks.
Missing some ingredients
because we ate them.

 Hooooney look what I made.

After a taste test spouse told me it was delicious. Unfortunately, we ate and washed the dishes before i remembered to take a picture.

How do you take a picture of the dish in the pot?

Point and shoot.

It doesn't come out right.

Then plate it.

Then I have to wash another dish and do we have any fresh herbs to sprinkle some decoration on top?

Did you buy any?

No

Then, no.

But then I can't do the BOOMBA!!!

The what?

Boomba. Emeril has BAAAM!!! when he throws food into a pot, I say booomba.

No exclamation marks?

!!!

This is my first food image. (Came out pale). I've joined the food blogging crowd. If anyone wants the recipe for Boomba rice, beans and accompanying Kale, sauce, (garlic) tofu curry with almond slices and fetch(Feta) let me know I'll add it.

There is neither sauce nor fetch. Autocorrect has dementia.

Are you a muggle?

 Feel free to respond to my previous post, but this is concerning.

I have to put this into context

The other day I was having a conversation with an aquaintance who is a POC. He was telling me in confidence that he plans to move back because he's giving up. Some of our conversation was in French. I speak several languages.

A few hours later I was waiting outside for someone who was late. A man in his seventies holding a cup of coffee asked me a question in a foreign language. I looked at him indicating that I didn't understand.

Oh did I get the wrong one? 

What language was it, Iasked.

He wouldn't answer. I'm interested in languages, he said.

So am I, I said.

He asks me something in Turkish then farsi. (Which I don't speak, but recognize). He didn't speak them, but had picked up a couple of sentences and asked me to guess what the language was.

I asked if he could identify xiexie. He guessed middle east. Wrong phonetics I said. Shisha? he tried.

Something feels wrong

Usually when I get drawn into these conversations, it's by people who have a genuine interest in linguistics or networking. I've met a climate scientist from Australia, a postgraduate student researching linguistics in computer models, a grandma whose son is a researcher at CERN, all because of our accents. We both come away enriched.

How did you become interested in languages? I asked. Oh, I have 10 children with the same wife, they live all over.

Not credible.

Then he asked how I knew the poc guy, was it a friend, was I related.

Xiexie means thank you in mandarin chinese, I replied.

Then he told me that he can trace his ancestry back 200 years and that he is Arian. He started asking me personal questions. Weird, because I'm tall blonde and blue-eyed. I was extremely uncomfortable and told him that it was none of his business.

This is the second time in the last week that this has happened. I'm assuming it's trending? I don't know how to interpret what he was after.

H.O.P.E. The power of words

  

H.O.P.E. The power of this season

 This is a powerful season. Always has been. It is a season that fights the darkness with light and hope. I saw an interesting acronym;

H.O.P.E.: Hang on. Pain Ends.

I was looking for some good quotes and images for this post, but gargle gave me mostly trite kitsch. While trying to find a transcript of the simple but effective text only speech of King Charles, I was inundated with ads. (If anyone has the patience to find a text only version I'd appreciate it).

His Christmas 2025 speech can be viewed here:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=Ciqg2W0T-8c

The history of the poster below is on Wikipedia.

During world War Two the Brits accomplished the impossible and won. The government put out various posters to motivate and encourage with the now ubiquitous Keep calm and carry on posters. Those type of subliminal messages address our subconscious and do work.

King Charles alluded to some of this history in his speech, speaking of the literal and figurative "journey" of our lives and geographic displacement. Whether he merely reiterated key words based on what he hears from the public I do not know.

Hope, courage, resilience, bravery, compassion and Respect (which he mentioned at least twice) are the key words for 2026. Words matter, but become meaningless if there is no action. 

We will have to give eachother light through deeds. Help eachother and offer more than meaningless words. Step out of our own communities and give light, because it is no longer Christmas business as usual. We've done it for hundred thousands of years during the winter months. That is the power of this season.

I wrote this prior to Christmas or whatever people celebrate because it applies throughout the winter season and will apply in 2026.

I have come across social media posts where people complain that these are just meaningless words. I agree; actions speak louder than words. Speeches may show intent, but can lose their power.

But so do the words spoken and written by people who harm others. They are also just words, aren't they? And yet they have the power to incite physical and mental harm to others.

But words can also 'incite' to do something good. Words will matter in 2026.

As always please do not mention or insult any politicians.

Greeting cards, they are more than the thought that counts, much more

Pop Up Card

 Sometimes helping someone get through a difficult time can be as small as a card.

In high school, word got around that I could draw really well, I was asked to draw a card for a teacher who was quite ill. I drew a perfect Blue Jay handed it to the person collecting them. Too young (and stupid) to ask if I could give it to him myself.

I often included my cards in the gifts I gave to friends and family. I was very selective. Uncle creepy or Aunt Gossip queen got a store bought one as did anyone where I felt a professional boundary may be crossed. They were wildlife and flowers so the theme doesn't really fit Christmas nor was I going to handraw/paint 30 cards.

Then came commissions by galleries and museums. I discovered a place were I could color print them onto cardstock. The exposure was great, but at 50% profit per card through the gallery, simply not worth my time. The materials cost me a few dollars per card, I would have been fine selling them for ten each, despite the fact that each took me half an hour to glue, and calligraphy (verb?). I also couldn't mass produce them, this was merely a hobby at the professional level.

My contract was always the same, the gift shops had to buy them outright, then pay me the difference of what was sold. All of them always did, but when a botanical garden gift shop also wanted me to provide little plastic sleeves against the humidity (they also sold plants), I thought four bucks per card simply wasn't worth the time.

Hand made cards weren't valued, but when I walked past a window display there were intricate pop up cards selling for 25 to 40 a piece. I hoped to get some, but they were sold out before they went on sale.

When I discussed it with my father, ever the business man, he told me:"waste of your talent"

Around 2008 the postal service was struggling, artists and crafters created artists trading cards. It turned into a movement, with so many participants that the media noticed.

Back to greeting cards. Some of the friends I gave them to, gave me no feedback. One of my friends had no interest in art. Then why did I bother, if they meant nothing? All that time and care to get him through a difficult time, and the cards were part of that, had no value. I was getting e greeting cards back.

We lost touch, but reconnected. Somehow art came up. "But you were never interested in art," I  said. "I liked your cards. They're beautiful. My mother thought God was guiding them. That you were a guardian angel. I kept them all. Framed one of them. They helped."

Stunned silence.

When I went through my father's things, I found a box. Many, many years of my hand painted cards, tied with a ribbon. Every.Single.One. Well worn from being looked at. One would have to know my father to understand how significant that was.

It mattered and was appreciated more than I was told. It lifted mood and allowed people to hang on to something in difficult times.

Encounter with a squirrel

 

Penguin biscuits 

I was in London and had an important decision to make. At the meeting they had handed out some Penguin chocolate wafers. I'd never heard of them.

I decided to make my decision by walking through Hyde Park. As I walked along the Serpentine, I stopped to eat my uninspired sandwich and remembered the wafer. I opened the wafer, bit into it and immediately noticed that there was nothing chocolate about it. Just the synthetic flavor.

On the rim of the garbage bin sat a corpulent squirrel, watching me. When she sat up it was quite obvious that she was preggers. I looked at the ingredients on the wrapper (squirrels should not eat chocolate) but this was safe. Mostly various fats and sugar.

I had some experience with wildlife rescue centers. Squirrels are actually omnivores. They are fed nuts fruit  veggies while being rehabilitated and even mealworms especially when they have a litter. Those that do not migrate away for the winter need the calories. Grey urban squirrels had displaced the red one, because they had adapted to a different diet.

Here's a tame squirrel stealing some candy.

https://www.reddit.com/r/FunnyAnimals/comments/11iox8d/candy_thief/?share_id=OaYQciY94aBuMbZvQS7JZ&utm_content=1&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_source=share&utm_term=1

I broke off a piece and handed it to her between thumb and index finger. She daintily grabbed it and polished it off. She looked at me for more.She simply sat there, her paws tucked in waiting to be fed. I broke off another little piece. Again, she gently took it from my fingers and nibbled away.

A woman had stopped to watch us. "It's lovely to see", she said. I nodded.

I was having a moment of interspecies mutual trust with lady squirrel. Nature had tapped me on my shoulder as a fellow blogger had taught me. As I continued on my thinking walk, I was in a better mood, because of this gentle encounter. Made my decision, which turned out to be the right one.

Funny moments with strangers

 Overheard in public places

1. A couple and their teen daughter were walking toward me. Mother is recounting a story. Teen gets distracted by an ice cream place, husband trails behind. Mother exasperated to me:" This one walks off in one direction that one in another. Who the hell am I telling my story to?"

2. Couple is walking their young Labrador in the evening. Dog let's out a deep bark and starts going after something. Her:"We are the only couple with a dog who barks at a shoe."

3. Sitting on the patio of a restaurant. Guest next to me asks the waiter: "Do you have any dessert?" Waiter comes back with the menu. What is this? 

It's cashew paste with mint cream, says the waiter. Guest makes a face" Do you have anything else?" No.

Guest: It's like Russia. You have a choice, but there is only one.

4. Sitting in a park with a playground. Father brings in his toddler. She starts wobble running toward the playground. Father: "OK, honey amuse yourself. I'll come pick you up in two hours."