Men

 

I could not find the image that was in my old sociology book; a line drawing where the little boy yells at a dog in what is called anger transference so this 1954 one will have to do.

I've never understood it and later in life I did not experience it. The person you're with should be someone that isn't getting yelled at because socks aren't mended, but someone who listens to your bad day, comforts, gives solutions or gives you space.

November is End Vaw month. And the internet which is slowly turning into Jenga is silent. Nothing on blogs, which is disappointing. The statistics are bad and getting worse and I wonder about the lack of engagement because the laws are getting better. (I'm only talking about the western world).

I took bystander intervention, a course or workshop that anyone can take (albeit not as fun as an art or pottery class). A couple of years ago I intervened. I was walking down the street heard a women scream, then obvious sounds of harm. An older woman (feisty Italian as it turned out) was walking toward me. She figured out which apartment it was while I called the cops. Long story short, the young male was brought out, we also waited to be interviewed and overheard him whine about his stress. He admitted it but there was no remorse. The typical BS sobstory. Coward.

I have chosen to ignore a certain small but powerful group. There is no masculinity of any kind in beating someone smaller than you or insulting someone less powerful than you. Its actually quite small. There's a lot more masculinity in helping. Much more heroic, so why discuss people that I don't associate with? Besides the fact that they are the true "other" with behavior that is too disturbing to discuss.

It led me to thinking about the YA fantasy Twilight, which I skip read just to know what the hype was about and the problem I've always had with vampire romance. Why on earth would a 200 year old (male) being find a teeny even remotely attractive or interesting? What is there to talk about. It was written by a woman, if she can make vampire skin sparkle in the sun, I'm sure she could have imagined something more progressive. Literature does influence a child's mind.

But this is not about fiction, but reality and ending vaw in all its forms. One tiny step at a time.

To complete the circle of life, thought this was hilarious